If we’re going to talk about belonging theory, we might as well talk about it through the most unexpectedly profound case study of our time: Schitt's Creek.
Yes. I said it.
Because if belonging had a live-action lab experiment, it would be the Rose family moving to a town they literally bought as a joke.
Let’s break this down.
Belonging Is Built Through Relationships (Even When You Don’t Want Them)
When the Roses arrive in Schitt’s Creek, they are not seeking connection… they are seeking Wi-Fi.
But belonging doesn’t wait for readiness. It waits for relationships.
In my Five Rs framework, relationships are the connective tissue. Without them, belonging collapses faster than Moira’s wig wall during a minor inconvenience.
Belonging is not about fitting in. It is about being seen, known, and valued in relationship.
And what happens?
- Johnny Rose slowly builds mutual respect with Roland Schitt (against his will).
- Moira Rose finds purpose in the Jazzagals and later the community theater.
- David Rose and Patrick Brewer create one of the healthiest queer love stories ever put on TV.
- Alexis Rose develops actual friendships. Real ones. With depth. Growth. And mutuality.
Belonging emerges because relationships become reciprocal — not transactional, not performative. Reciprocal.
We See Each Other (Even When We Start With Eye Rolls): Finding Respect
Early Schitt’s Creek is essentially six straight episodes of everyone silently judging each other’s life choices. But here’s the shift: they begin to see one another.
Respect in the Five Rs is about how we treat people, ourselves, and the spaces we share. Schitt’s Creek quietly models something radical: people are not merely tolerated — they are honored.
In my theory, belonging requires respect and visibility — not just physical presence, but emotional recognition. We ask:
- Who sees me?
- Who understands my story?
- Who values my contribution?
Patrick doesn’t just love David. He sees him. Fully. Dramatic sweaters and all.
Stevie doesn’t just work at the motel. She is seen by Johnny as capable, intelligent, and worthy of investment. The town doesn’t tolerate the Roses — they grow to value them.
That shift — from tolerance to value — is where belonging lives. Respect grows when proximity turns into care.
Belonging Expands When Power Softens and We Take Responsibility
At the start, the Roses define themselves by status. Wealth. Prestige. “People who summer.”
When all of that disappears, they are stripped down to identity without power.
Here’s the thing I talk about often: belonging deepens when hierarchy softens. And with that softening comes responsibility for our spaces and our own sense of belonging.
In Schitt’s Creek:
- The mayor eats at the same café as everyone else.
- The motel owner works the front desk.
- The local mechanic gives romantic advice.
- The wealthy family learns to receive.
Power equalizes. And in that equalization, humanity becomes visible. Belonging cannot thrive in rigid hierarchy. It flourishes in mutual dignity.
Responsibility is accountability to self, others, and community. It is also the R most people try to emotionally unsubscribe from.
By the end of the series, the Roses stop acting like temporary visitors in their own lives.
- Johnny takes responsibility for rebuilding something meaningful.
- Moira shows up for the town she once dismissed.
- Alexis owns her growth (and her past — looking at you, international escapades).
- David commits — not just to Patrick, but to staying rooted in a place that now holds him.
Responsibility is the moment belonging becomes durable. Not vibes. Not feelings. Commitment.
Identity Is Not the Problem — Isolation Is: Finding Relevance
One of the most radical things about Schitt’s Creek is what it refuses to do.
David’s queerness is never the crisis. It is never weaponized. It is never rejected by the town.
The conflict is relational, not identity-based — and that matters.
Belonging theory reminds us that exclusion is rarely about inherent identity; it is about disconnection and fear. Schitt’s Creek imagines a world where identity is not debated — it is simply integrated.
And honestly? That’s the dream.
This connects directly to Relevance, one of the Five Rs.
Relevance asks the uncomfortable question:
Does this space actually matter to me?
At first, Schitt’s Creek is deeply irrelevant to the Roses. It is a place to survive, not belong. But relevance grows through lived experience:
- The motel becomes Johnny’s purpose.
- The boutique becomes David’s creative home.
- The community stage becomes Moira’s artistic revival.
- Alexis discovers — against all odds — that personal growth is, in fact, her brand.
Belonging cannot happen in spaces that feel meaningless. The Roses stay long enough for the town to become personally significant.
And once relevance appears, everything else accelerates.
The Town Changes the Roses — And the Roses Change the Town: Reciprocity
Belonging is co-created.
It is not something a space gives you. It is something people build together.
The Roses don’t just assimilate — they contribute:
- Johnny revitalizes the motel business.
- Moira elevates the arts.
- David creates a small business hub.
- Alexis invests in education and purpose.
And in return? The town gives them grounding, perspective, humor, and actual human intimacy.
What we are seeing is reciprocity.
Reciprocity in belonging means energy flows both directions — not charity, not extraction. Mutual investment.
Early on, the Roses mostly take:
- free housing (well… motel living),
- town patience,
- and emotional labor from literally everyone.
But over time, the exchange balances.
And David and Patrick again give us the gold standard. Their relationship works because care flows both ways:
- Patrick grounds David.
- David stretches Patrick.
- Both adapt.
- Both invest.
- Both grow.
That is reciprocity. Not perfection — mutual movement.
So What’s the Funny Takeaway?
If you want to operationalize the Five Rs of Belonging, Schitt’s Creek offers a surprisingly solid implementation plan:
- Start with relationships (even the awkward ones).
- Practice respect beyond surface-level tolerance.
- Stay long enough for relevance to develop.
- Invest in reciprocity — give and receive.
- Take responsibility for the community you claim to care about.
Or, if you prefer the Rose family method:
- Lose your fortune.
- Move somewhere you swore you’d never live.
- Accidentally build authentic community.
Either path works.
Or — and this may be easier — start by investing in reciprocal relationships where you are.
Because here’s the real Schitt’s Creek lesson:
- Belonging doesn’t come from where you live.
- It comes from who sees you, stays with you, and grows with you.
- Even if they pronounce “bébé” incorrectly.
At the end of the day, the Five Rs remind us of something Schitt’s Creek demonstrates beautifully:
Belonging is not about perfect spaces. It is about sustained, reciprocal, responsible relationships.
Even if those relationships begin in a motel lobby… and involve an alarming number of wigs.
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